A man entered a
restaurant and sat at the only open table. As he sat down, he knocked the spoon
off the table with his elbow. A nearby waiter reached into his shirt pocket, pulled
out a clean spoon, and set it on the table.
The diner was impressed. "Do all the waiters here carry spoons in their pockets?"
The waiter replied, "Yes. Ever since an Efficiency Expert visited our restaurant...
He determined that 17.8% of our diners knock the spoon off the table. By carrying
clean spoons with us, we save trips to the kitchen."
The diner ate his meal. As he was paying the waiter, he commented, "Forgive the
intrusion, but do you know that you have a string hanging from your fly?"
The waiter replied, "Yes, we all do. Seems that the same Efficiency Expert determined
that we spend to much time washing our hands after using the men's room. So, the
other end of that string is tied to my penis. When I need to go, I simply pull
the string, do my thing, and then return to work. Having never touched myself,
there really is no need to wash my hands. Saves a lot of time."
"Wait a minute," said the diner, "how do you get your penis back in your pants?"
"Well, I don't know about the other guys, but I use the spoon."