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FUNNY
QUOTES ABOUT DRINKING & DRUGS
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Funny
Quotes |
| 51. |
"Actually
it only takes me one drink to get drunk. The trouble is I can't remember if it's
the thirteenth or fourteenth."
George Burns |
| 52. |
"One
day recently a man called out to me from the other side of the street asking me
for the price of a drink. I beckoned him to come over for it and he waved me away.
This has to be the Everest of laziness."
Jeffery Bernard |
| 53. |
"Health
is what my friends are always drinking before they fall down."
Phyllis Diller |
| 54. |
"I
distrust camels, and anyone else who can go for a week without a drink."
Joe E Lewis |
| 55. |
"I
have been advised my the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to
give up alcohol."
WC Fields |
| 56. |
"The
reason I drink is because when I'm sober I think I'm Eddie Fisher."
Dean Martin |
| 57. |
"I
can resist everything except temptation."
Oscar Wilde. |
| 58. |
"If
you drink, don't drive. Don't even drink."
Dean Martin |
| 59. |
"I
got so wasted one night I waited for the Stop sign to change, and it did."
Steve Krabitz |
| 60. |
"I
went to hospital for a liver transplant and boy was I unlucky - They gave me Oliver
Reed's."
Lenny Windsor |
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