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Funny Quotes Welcome to Aardvark Archie's Guide to FUNNY QUOTES , the site that knows a funny quote when it hears one!
For the best in Adult funny quotes and really humorous quotations and witticism, just click on the links below to get viewing some of the funniest quotations, funny celebrity insults and adult humor around!
FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT RELIGION
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# Funny Quotes
1. "I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night."
Woody Allen.
2. "If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?"
George Deacon.
3. "I dislike blasphemy on purely rational grounds. If there is no God, blasphemy is stupid and unnecessary; if there is, then it's damned dangerous."
Flan O'Brien.
4. "And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected."
Spike Milligan.
5. "God is love, but get it in writing."
Gypsy Rose Lee.
6. "Adam was the luckiest man in the world. He had no mother-in-law."
Sholom Aleichem
7. "I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass."
Bob Davies.
8. "I don't pray because I don't want to bore God."
Orson Welles.
9. "I have four children which is not bad considering I'm not a Catholic."
Peter Ustinov.
10. "As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on."
Woody Allen.
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