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Funny Quotes Welcome to Aardvark Archie's Guide to FUNNY QUOTES , the site that knows a funny quote when it hears one!
For the best in Adult funny quotes and really humorous quotations and witticism, just click on the links below to get viewing some of the funniest quotations, funny celebrity insults and adult humor around!
FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT SEX
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# Funny Quotes
11. "The Love Bird is 100% faithful to his mate, as long as they are locked together in the same cage."
Will Cuppy
12. "Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night."
Woody Allen
13. "My best birth control now is to leave the lights on."
Joan Rivers
14. "It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on."
Marylyn Munroe.
15. "Oh Lord give me chastity, but do not give it yet."
St Augustine
16. "The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutang trying to play the violin."
Honore de Balzac
17. "My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty."
Woody Allen
18. "Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend's house during a power failure."
Bob Hope
19. "I'm glad I'm not bisexual. I couldn't stand being rejected by men as well as women."
Bernard Manning.
20. "I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds."
Joan Rivers
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