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Funny Quotes Welcome to Aardvark Archie's Guide to FUNNY QUOTES , the site that knows a funny quote when it hears one!
For the best in Adult funny quotes and really humorous quotations and witticism, just click on the links below to get viewing some of the funniest quotations, funny celebrity insults and adult humor around!
FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT DRINKING & DRUGS
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# Funny Quotes
11. "The difference between a drunk and a alcoholic is that a drunk doesn't have to attend all those meetings."
Arthur Lewis.
12. "I don't like people who take drugs... Customs men for example."
Mick Miller.
13. "I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it."
Rodney Dangerfield.
14. "Real ale fans are just like train-spotters, only drunk."
Christopher Howse.
15. "Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold."
Jerry Vale
16. "Prohibition is better than no liquor at all."
Will Rogers.
17. "The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a beer bottle, they're on TV."
Homer Simpson.
18. "Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs."
Robin Williams.
19. "I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry."
Robert Benchley.
20. "I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast."
WC Fields
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